Our Family's ADHD Journey - Part One

Here & there, I've mentioned that The Archangel has ADHD. I decided to do a series of posts to share our struggles we've faced as we try to find the balance between peace & chaos in our home.

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For as long as I can remember, The Archangel has been a hyperactive child & I've told people that he was constantly on the go - physically & verbally! I was told not to worry, he's a boy. Last year, I came across a list of ADHD symptoms put together by the American Pediatric Association (APA). The DSM-IV (Diagnostic & Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders 4th Edition) breaks ADHD into three categories - Inattention, Hyperactivity, & Impulsivity. Those w/ ADHD can have one, two, or all three parts. When I compared The Archangel to the symptoms listed he fit:

2 out of 9 for Inattention

6 out of 6 for Hyperactivity

3 out of 3 for Impulsivity

Other qualifications are that the symptoms present themselves before age seven & occur in two or more settings. Yep, that fits!

In addition to the hyperactivity, he is also quick to anger. We've joked in the past that he has a "Jeckyll & Hyde Personality" - kind & loving, getting along w/ others one moment, then mean, spiteful, & argumentative the next. Most days we feel like we're walking on eggshells around him, wondering what will be the next trigger to set him off.

The anger & aggression really increased last year, during his first grade year of homeschooling. Many were the days (& still are) when I would set an assignment in front of him & before I could begin an explanation, he'd say it was too hard & couldn't do it. He'd break his pencil or throw it across the room, tear or crumple his paper, &/or stomp off, pushing over any chairs in his way. Once he calmed down enough to complete the work, he'd say, "That wasn't hard!"

One evening, he became angry w/ Casinodad & The Prophet because he thought they had skipped his turn on a computer game. He stomped to the couch, crying & threw his glasses...which landed by my feet in the next room.

While he argues & fights w/ all of his siblings, The Princess seems to be the one on the receiving end the majority of the time. He talks down to her, calls her names, & says that her songs/stories/creations are dumb. He belittles her & has to disagree w/ anything she says, even it she's expressing her feelings on a subject. If she's doing something that he perceives to be even slightly annoying, his impulsivity kick in. He will begin to yell at her, call her names, push or hit her, kick whatever toys she's playing with, etc. I do have to say that there are times when the two of them play VERY well together. Although those moments are few & far between, we do take the extra effort to recognize & praise the behavior.

With all of his anger & aggression, I began to wonder if he might also have Oppositional Defiant Disorder. After all, he fits all eight of the behaviors listed in the DSM-IV. One thing that distinguishes him from someone w/ ODD, though, is that their actions are intentional & they show no remorse. The Archangel's behaviors at times can be intentional, brought on by the impulse to react in various situations (especially w/ The Princess). However, most times he will apologize on his own & say that he loves us.

(To Be Continued)